Thursday, July 12, 2007
♥ 9:32 AM
Was thinking through a few stuff recently... Suddenly everything that seems so real that time seems to be premediated... It left me confused... Should i just think about the bad and forget about the good??? But then you just can dismiss all the stuff hat was done by just listing a few good things?? Because the more I ponder the more i think it's weird... Would someone really do that???A person that you trust and believe?? But then again it may be just a trap laid by you for a long time...Maybe you just can't take the temptation??? Too much maybes'... I heard an explaination from you...But that answer just doesn't seem believable...You seem to have a motive...I know that's bad of me...Think about how bad people are.. But that's the truth... Or maybe i just feel insecure...I used to truast ppl too much and ended being betrayed...But now it's time to grow up and believe only in YOURSELF...
There are too many people in the world who put on a mask everyday...I don't deny putting on a mask.. I can only be myself in front of my family and close friends.. I once thought everyone should be treated the same....But i never knew that one should learn to protect themselves too... I let down that shield when i thought you were my friend.. But thinking back about the stuff you did.. leaving me guilt-ridden..Maybe what he say was right...You have a purpose... There's still a rift between us now...People say that time will heal.. But for us..I don't think it'll...I wont allow that again also...
All the above are jus some nonsenscial ranting.. Just heck it...
Suddenly i feel so tired with work...Reent happenings makes that 'I DISLIKE WORK' feeling comes back to me once again... I thought I've long forgotten thatfeeling.. But it's back to haunt me again... Too much have happen... Am i destined to be a med tech for life???
I HOPE NOT...I always wanted to venture out to something else..But what's that somthing else??? I'm looking for that ans too.. Should i go back to my books?? Or should i give up all that I've learnt and look for a new job?? It's hard to start all over again... And I'm not young either...Sometimes i wonder what shit have i stepped on... Why is the same things happening again??? I hate myself sometimes...
I hope this and next week pass fast...A break will be gd for the mind and soul... I might be refresh after my break.. I might be missing work after the break.. I might.. I might...
